| For Better Or Worse: A Plane Ride With Young Kids, From Both Sides of the Marital Fence | | Print | |
| Written by Tom and Cynthia Papa | |
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Page 4 of 5 LANDING? T: The pilot comes on to announce that we’ve started our descent but instead lets us know there are major backups at LAX and we will be circling for another 45 [very bumpy] minutes. I’ve got a bad feeling. Not that we’ll crash, but worse: we’re going to end up in a series of endless delays. C: The seatbelt light goes on. The plane starts shaking. My stomach lurches. I want to keep a brave face for the girls. I hear myself saying ridiculous things like, “Wee, this is fun!” and “Shaky, shaky.” The girls laugh. The man behind us scowls. Tom gives me the look that alerts me that I am not using my “inside voice.” The 2-year-old is crying for me to hold her. I know the flight attendant is going to come over any second to tell me to buckle her in. I know that if I put her down she will go into hysterics. Suddenly, I feel hot liquid on my leg. “Potty,” she says, a little late. My clothes are the final set of emergency clothes, and I am wearing them. T: When your kid pees on your wife, the hardest part is trying not to laugh. With the kids monopolizing my iPod and iPhone, this is the best show I’ve seen all flight. C: We land. Hooray! But not so fast. There are no gates available. It could be up to an hour before we can deplane. Nooo! All the passengers, who I am convinced want us dragged off the plane by our ankles, must love us even more now that we smell like the zoo on a hot August day. T: I’m numb. I picture us stuck on this plane for hours and hours like those horror stories we heard about last winter. And somehow I don’t care. I’m so exhausted that I’ve given up. I fantasize about living on this plane for the rest of my life and I smile to myself. |
